April fool’s day is here with us. I remember a story in a courtroom whereby they say that an atheist went to petition against there not being a holiday for atheists. The judge read for him that part in the Bible that says, ‘the fool says in his heart there is no God.’ He banged the gavel and said, ‘there you go April fool’s day is your day, next case.’
And talking of fool’s, I once found myself in that department. Asusena and I were having an afternoon nap on our divine mattress cum world bank. You know those days we’d dig holes in mattresses and keep Mama’s change despite her not asking us to ‘keep change.’
So we are in bed and Asusena decides, ‘lets play a game.’ I’ curious to know the game and she suggests that we eat bar soap. You know that white star bar soap that had become so popular back in the days. To make matters serious, she already had a small leftover bar. I look at her like she is some space alien but she goes on to cut a piece from the said bar and munches it like it’ the juiciest mango south of the Sahara. She gives me that look of, ‘you mean you can’t do that? Don’t blame me but the Gakware in me wanted so much to prove my badassedness because I grabbed the bar and tore a piece and started munching on it like, what the hell! The torture I endured as I downed the soapy goodness could not be compared with the look of triumph as I looked into Asusena’s cunning eyes and told her, ‘you thought I couldn’t?’ What I discovered next however left me jaded for life. Kumbe Asusena had a roasted sweet potato in place of the soap. If you want to know what happened to Gakware next after I thoroughly washed the soapy taste off my tongue, please read my chronicle on the drive.👇👇
After all mūndū mūūgī ndarī mīheere ya ūhoro. I was the fool, I guess I could sing the Asusena that Whitney Houston’s song, ‘ I’m wiser now, I’m not the foolish girl you used to know…..’ But that will be after I finish sipping this kadrink. I don’t ever want to remember that soapy taste ever.