Author Archives: Nyar Kaheti

These promo people wueeh. Hadithi, hadithi, hadithi njoo. Story, story, story come. Once upon a time, way back in Nyayo hostel, a promo girl knocked on our door. As the Bible says, ‘knock and it shall be opened,’ you should have seen us all proud of ourselves that we were the one’s opening the door,Continue reading “Pitched.”

Mīatūka/ cracks. Ooh these were partners in crime. We were stuck with them for life or so we thought. They were the silent marks of humble beginnings; where soap was a luxury/ Veblen good, mostly used for washing clothes/ taking a bath on Sundays. Evenings were mostly marked by gūcabacabia maī in a basin, placingContinue reading “Amazed”

When you put on the television and you find a different kind of music than the one you are used to. You know that kind that it’s fans always say, ‘message!’ thats when you realise that this is just the kind of change you needed albeit for a while. It’s when you realise that ChinuaContinue reading “A different kind of grain.”

Fear of the unknown has always engulfed us day in day out. It’s something embedded deep inside our veins from the very inception of our DNA. Maybe it’s a self preservation or I don’t know a survival tactic. Kinda like the adrenal rush that saw Mūrife run of stick.Growing up in the days when shoesContinue reading “Mūrife don’t run”

Narespect kila hustle lakini kuna two towns nimeona with very peculiar hawkers. Moja ni Karatina and no. 2 ni Nakuru, or is it a city nowadays. Wueeh the hawkers in these towns don’t give a damn about body language. They’ll talk to you, see that you’ve shaken your head in a not interested style butContinue reading “Cocooned.”

Have you ever been told something by someone that carried you like a bus, only this did not carry you like the bus Judy or the Bus Rīakanau or coming closer to the slopes of the mountain you could say like Magutu controller. Haha, ama kama vile hawa maOrezzo wetu walibebwa huko Uingereza. At leastContinue reading “No invitation”

Just when I was about to think that I was slowly but surely turning into a dreamer like Joseph, I woke up to the sad fact that instead of dreaming about Jacob’s ladder, I was dreaming that I’d turned into Kīhaico’s ladder and the cows were climbing up and down my back 😂. Seriously whoContinue reading “A dreamer”

Stage fright can be characterized by several behavioural and physiological manifestations such as sweating, being tongue tied, dry mouth and even loss of words. I don’t know if being tongue tied and the tongue clinging to the roof of the mouth is one and the same thing?However what I do know, is that stage frightContinue reading “Aced”

Kuna vitu ambavyo ni sure bet. Kama mat ya 2NK kupitia fuelling station immediately after kutoka stage. Then some dude gets out and rushes to the washrooms to relieve himself and I’m left wondering what could he have done if it hadn’t stopped? Then again as I’d said in my opening remarks, hii ni sureContinue reading “A sure bet.”

Too many recent disassociations. The Damianos recently disassociated themselves with Chererror’s scientific calculator and then the plumbers were second in the EQMS to disassociate themselves with claims that they’d stay in the vicinity of the bathroom after repairs to watch the missus shower. I wonder who’s gonna lodge a complaint next.Yeah I also wonder whatContinue reading “Lodged”